[Written by Shawndee Lovoy]
We had 4 children in 5 years. Yes, you read that right! When our oldest son Isaac was 5 our youngest child Maryrose was born. December of 2007, when we brought our 4th baby home, Isaac was 5, Juliette was 4, James was 2, and we brought home our newborn Maryrose. My body, heart, mind and soul belonged to so many people that it was hard to distinguish who I was from them. Those were precious years and many years of pure survival.
Fast forward….to August 2022. Isaac is a sophomore at Auburn University. Juliette is a freshman at Mississippi State University. James is a sophomore at Hoover High School, and Maryrose is a freshman at Briarwood Christian School. My heart still lives in 5 different places each day, but it is different. They are there and I am here. Some need me more than others and all need me for different reasons, but they aren’t dependent on me for survival.
My amazing parents always told me, it is our job as parents to raise you to leave. We aren’t raising you to be dependent on us, we are raising you to be dependent on the Lord and to be fully capable humans ready to thrive in this world. This has always been in mine and Jason’s minds through all these years of raising our children. We have certainly not done it all right and we have made countless mistakes. Thank you, Jesus that we have a perfect Savior, who loves them, calls them His own, and always keeps His Covenant Promises.
So here we are. Isaac spent the entire summer after his freshman year at Auburn living in Greenville, SC, working sun up to sundown at a paid internship with Brasfield and Gorrie in his field of study. Juliette was beyond ready to move to another state, study fashion production/design, join a sorority, and get involved in a campus ministry. James continues to work towards his goal of playing soccer in college and has matured so much this past year it blows me away. Maryrose is pure fun and laughter. She keeps us smiling and works hard at her goals for high school and beyond.
We have good seasons and tough seasons. There have been trials, tears, and hard decisions, but most of all, great peace in watching God’s providence play out in our children’s lives. Through it all, my prayer and goal is for my children to trust that God is at work even when they can’t see it. My prayer is that they need us less and less and need Him more and more. My prayer is that they have confidence in everyday life because they know the One who holds their lives.
It’s hard to describe the feeling of being needed less and less by your children. It is something I have to pray through, give to the Lord over and over, and fill in other ways. It is something I will bear knowing that the goal is being accomplished. The goal of raising them to leave.
